Make It your Own

Have you ever taken on a project that seems too big to ever accomplish? One that needs to be done, but just the thought of it stresses you out? I mean you could have thought through everything, planned it all out, watched all the YouTube videos, and even started it to find out that it is beyond what you are capable of. That was our basement. I mean we had been talking about remodeling it for a couple years now. We bought a house with an unfinished space so that we could add our own touches to it, but the problem is, we are not very handy. Well I should speak for myself, my wife is pretty handy. Yet a basement by herself, was going to be a stretch for her that she was not willing to make. And I get it. So what do you do? Well here is that story.

It all started when we decided to help out a family member, and have her three children move in with us for about a year. At the time when we decided to help out we were not sure how long it was going to take, but we knew it was going to be a bit of time. This was not an easy decision to make, but it was one that was made quickly. It needed to be. These kiddos were going to be placed with someone they did not know, in a home that was very foreign to them, and at a time where they really needed a support system to help them get back on and stay on track. Now I am not saying we are perfect by any means, but we at the time were pretty stable.

It wasn’t long after they moved in that we realized we needed more space. You see we were a family of seven already, and we were sort of bursting through the seams of the space that we already had. We had most children sharing rooms, and I was trying to work from home with little to no space for the kids to play, go to school, live, or even just eat, without being on every one of my conference calls. So we knew that adding three more would just escalate that problem. So in July of 2021 we started talking about remodeling the basement.

It went through many ideas of how we were going to do it. The first was that we were just going to do a quick job. Put some outlets in, frame it out for one big space, put some cheap linoleum down, and call it good. Simple and cheap. Quick and easy. We even employed the services of my mother who is VERY handy as well. But then we said with the rise of costs of materials it wouldn’t be that cheap, and we have no free time anyway. When will we ever get it done? So that seemed like not the right idea.

The next idea was that I had a friend that could do it. I haven’t hung out with him in forever, and we had been starting to talk again. I had talked to him about the birth of my daughter and all the things we had gone through. I had started to meet with him bi-weekly to make sure we were both going after the things that God had put in our hearts. But the problem was that he lived in Washington state, and that is pretty far from the midwest. But he is from here. So maybe I can pay for him and his wife to get here. They can see family, friends, and stay with us while he helps me finish the basement. Well it wasn’t going to be feasible. The amount of time it would take, and the jobs that they had, it just wasn’t going to work out. So that idea is out. Which leaves us to our last choice.

We hired someone. The process of finding someone that you trust, that is in the price range that you are willing to pay, and that will listen to your ideas and help guide you along the way was not super easy. But we did it, and in February of 2022 we started the remodel of our basement. Only seven months after we started really talking about getting it done. But we needed it. And you would think the hard work is done because you have someone doing it, and everything is going to be taken care of. That was not my experience. The work had just begun.

The cool thing about the project and the builders was that they let us be a part of the decision making along the way. The bad news was that we were a part of the decision making. So it seemed as though we were always “needed” to help make a decision. It was almost like we were building it, but not actually building it with our hands. Not terrible, but time consuming, and remember if you counted already, we have eight children in our home. Not much time on our hands.

After about three and half months, many back and forths, additions to the original plans, subtractions from the original plans, and all the struggles that came with building during covid, we had our basement in late May of 2022. It was done. And MAN IS IT AWESOME! There are little things here and there that I am like “man I wish they would have done a little better with this”, but overall it is exactly how we wanted it to turn out. We LOVE the ocean and the theme we went with is this light blue aqua color, with white finishes and just the most adventurous theme to the ocean you can think of. I am currently sitting in my basement living area of the master bedroom, my office, and man cave all in one. So beautiful.

But what adventure came out of this? Well there is so much to learn about taking a project or job or task that is bigger than what you think you can handle.

The first thing we had to do, was start. We decided it was going to be done, and then we waited. How much sooner could we have had it done if we would have just started? Don’t let the fear grip you and keep you from getting started. You can do it. God can help you. People around you want to help out where they can also. So just start.

Secondly, start to dream about what you really want the outcome to be. Pray on it. Decide what is a priority and what is not. Is it practical? But most of all start to dream about it. You see we have dreamed about moving back to the ocean almost every day since we moved to the midwest. Yet we have not moved back for many reasons, but the idea, the dream was, if we can bring a little bit of the ocean to us then we can retreat to the ocean every day. And we do. It is calm and serene. We even created an outdoor patio area with a swing and chairs that we can just sit and relax on. It is what we dreamed of.

Lastly, though no perfect just let it be. I am a perfectionist at heart, and all too often it gets in my way. I have to think about how to do things the “right way”. How to make sure things turn out just right. How when things are done they are not done well enough. I project this too often on my family and it is not fair. So if you are like me, just let it be. It is ok the paint is not perfect or that one of our outlets was put in upside down. It is ok that I didn’t get the barn door like I wanted or that I put too many holes in my wall hanging up the tv. You see the little scars that already show in my basement remind me that life is not perfect. That even the new will one day wear down. That until the end and perfection is revealed, we are living in a place of imperfection. And that is ok.

So go live, even if you are not ready or not perfect or the time may not be just right. Just try it. Just do it. Just put yourself out there. Go adventure, whether locally or far away, and remember while on your journey to go in love. For it is love that leads us. It goes before us.

Until the next journey!